Wedding Guest Dresses: Fall/Winter Edition

This has been a much-requested post! I think we all can agree that picking an appropriate wedding guest attire can be very trying at times. A lot of wedding invites use ambiguous wording at best to describe what to wear. Then you show up at the wedding and find people in a wide variation. It can make you question, did I read the invite wrong? Did they? Obviously there is plenty of room to interpret the dress code as you’d like. Plus, it’s our prerogative as we all appreciate being able to showcase our individuality through our selections.

With that being said, Caitlin and I have a few unwritten rules we typically abide by. We would rather show up overdressed than under dressed. Hopefully, we can help you avoid standing out for the wrong reasons. As tall women, we’re noticed first when entering a room as well as on the dance floor. While I’d love for that not to be the case on the dance floor, I definitely don’t mind people noticing me when I took the time and care to dress well and do my makeup and hair nicely.

The second rule is mainly about length. I don’t like to worry about showing too much leg at a wedding, so you’ll typically find me in a midi dress length. Caitlin feels the same way, especially when you attend the ceremony in a church. It feels a little disrespectful to show up with something that you could wear to a club. Personal preference for us though. So if you like to show a bit more leg, this might not be as helpful to you. Definitely not against the use of cutouts or showing cleavage, because all of that can be easily covered in a church with a wrap or a cardigan etc. And we, of course, go by the unspoken rule of NEVER wearing white or a primarily white printed dress.

So without further ado, let’s jump in and break it down by dress code!

Casual

Let’s say it’s a courthouse wedding, or maybe a backyard wedding. Something a bit more lowkey or maybe they did a destination wedding and are doing a party now they are back at home. This is the easiest because it really isn’t a typical wedding attire. You can show up in whatever you’d like! 

Semi-Formal (Cocktail/Dressy Casual)

This is where it starts to get a bit blurry on the rules. Clearly, you can’t show up casually dressed, but that’s still not easily translatable on what you should wear. Even at my job currently which is business casual, there is a WIDE array of choices that are “accepted.” When I say accepted in parentheses, it’s because I’m not sure a lot of people know how to discern it themselves let alone govern others choices! But I digress here. Basically, here is where we start to err on the side of dressier than more casual. Unless the dress code says casual, leave the leggings at home. It’s still safe to choose a print on your dress.

Cocktail

This route is pretty similar to semi-formal. Men would be in a suit, and the hemline can be from mid-thigh to mid-calf. There’s no need to avoid maxi dresses if you’re so inclined. Jersey fabric will be a clear no-no, you’ll want something with a stiffer fabric to dress it up. Definitely don’t need a gown. We wouldn’t do a floral for this dress code, but you can still go with some brighter colors. 

Caitlin is wearing this dress for the pictures, click here for the link. It’s the perfect Fall color.

Formal or Black Tie Optional

Here is where most people have a lot less experience. I know that between Caitlin and I, we’ve never attended a formal wedding. This is sad to me because I’d love an excuse to buy a ridiculously gorgeous full-length gown. But I know a lot of other women must be attending them because we spot a lot of amazing options when we’re online shopping. Floor-length is not expected, even with black tie. You can go the cocktail length or still midi length but a bit more subdued on color (ie no pastels, no prints typically).

Destination/Beach

Guest choices can run the gamut on options for beach weddings. Where men can get away with pretty casual and just wear un-tucked button-down shirts, we still have a plethora of choice. Where it might seem obvious to choose flowy, I’d be careful on length as a lot of beaches I’ve seen weddings have a lot of wind to contend with. If you go flowy you might want to stick with maxi length. However, this is an opportunity to get a bit bolder on color choices and/or patterns! If you go shorter, you might want to keep it tighter fitting, either body con or a shift.

Bridesmaid Duties

There’s bound to be opportunities for you to be asked to be a bridesmaid. While you may end up in a dress you don’t love, at least a lot of companies give the option to add additional length to fit our height. That’s a tall girl pet peeve of ours, however. They will add a specific length to the fabric, which costs extra money. Then if you don’t actually need that specific length, then you have to pay additional money to get it tailored. So now you have to spend more money than most. If you’re able to choose your own gown, we definitely recommend buying a tall option if possible. Tall tip: If the bride to be chooses a shorter length dress and it’s too short, ask if they offer the same style in floor length and have it hemmed. Caitlin did this last summer and it worked wonderfully! 

General Tall Tip: To see more options filter by midi length on all sites rather than only by tall and you will see hundreds more! They likely won’t fit like a midi but they will still be plenty long. Also shopping out of season and planning way ahead when a wedding is on the horizon will help you get a great deal on most dresses! 

Shoes

We hear you bemoaning the lack of shoe options, and we don’t blame you because our options are definitely limited. With that being said, we did some legwork and found some options up to size 15 available on Amazon. You can check out our picks at Amazon here. Please know that we get a commission by you clicking the link and purchasing any items. We try to provide a value for y’all to make your life a bit easier, so we appreciate your support and understanding on this! We’ve also attached a widget of other shoe options as well for larger feet. Some small businesses that aren’t available to link through the widget include CoIX shoes, and Smash Shoes for some beautiful dressier options.